The Better Business Bureau reports that car dealerships are the most complained about business type with cell phone sales a very distant second. No big surprise that car dealers are the brunt of consumer complaints. Car dealers have historically had a reputation for underhanded dealings which is why the term, “car salesman” evokes images of plaid jackets, patent leather shoes and toothpick sucking shysters.

To be fair, not all car dealerships are bad and not all car salespeople are scam artists, in fact most of them are quite the opposite. There is no shortage of bad salespeople and unscrupulous businesses in every industry, car dealers just seem to have gotten permanently tattooed with an unethical moniker.

In my marketing book I rant about the uselessness of car dealer websites. I ramble about the absurdity of practically every car dealer on the planet using one of three companies to develop their websites, email marketing and just about any other type of online advertising a dealership does. 

When it comes to marketing why would you use the same company that your competition uses? Every car dealer website seems to be a variation on every other car dealer website. The same useless information used over and over again.So why do car dealers do this? I’ll tell you why, because it’s easy. They have to put zero effort into it. They pick a template and all the content is created automatically. Even in their email marketing they just have to choose a few canned articles and voila! Instant email!  Sounds pretty easy right? When was the last time anything easy produced worthwhile results? The same car dealers that have been accused of scamming consumers seemingly have forgotten one of the oldest rules in the book when it comes to sniffing out a bad deal. “If it sounds too good to be true…”

With the car sales industry taking a major hit due to our current economic landscape it seems that dealerships are taking a second look at the web as a marketing tool and an even closer look at the services they are paying for. Recently I was called into a very prestigious Mercedes Benz dealer in New Jersey to take a look at their Internet marketing efforts.

After looking at their website, pay per click programs and email marketing it became abundantly clear that they were being ripped off. First off their website was exactly what I expected it to be, useless information. What I didn’t expect to see was a search engine spamming technique called, “cloaking”. Cloaking is where you use technology to show a search engine spider one thing and a website visitor another. This type of tactic is what got BMW banned from Google a couple of years ago.

On the Pay Per Click side of things they were paying for a ridiculous amount of irrelevant key phrases. One of the first questions I asked was, “do you sell Mercedes Motor Homes?” the answer was no so I wondered why they were paying to show up under that search phrase? The company handling this program for them gets paid on the clicks so they targeted lots of phrases even if they had no relevancy or benefit to the dealership.

Their email marketing program was no better (big surprise). Again, they are using the same service as all of their completion. Here’s how it works. Every month they select a few canned articles and an email newsletter is sent out to their list of 27,000 names. I asked if all the email addresses were people that purchased vehicles from their dealership. Half were and half were just people that requested information or stopped in while shopping for a car and end up purchasing elsewhere.

At first glance you may not think this is a big deal especially since they told me that they are getting some response. Here’s the catch. If I did not purchase a car from them and I’m on their mailing list chances are I’m on the mailing list for other dealerships as well. If they are all using this email marketing service that means I’m getting the same content from lots of dealerships. This is not only annoying but shows a lack of effort on the part of the dealership. They can’t event take the time to create something original? Here’s an opportunity to show your expertise and all you do with it is show that you’re the same as every other dealer and that I’m not worth the effort.

Long story short (too late) make sure you are involved in your marketing efforts. Know what people are doing on your behalf and stop being lazy! Nothing good happens without effort. If you truly want to connect with your customers show them that you care enough to put the effort in.

Some of you may say that it’s poetic justice that car dealers are being ripped off. Keep in mind each time they rip off a car dealer we the consumer end up paying for it in the end so if you happen to run across any of these car dealer centric marketing companies be sure to show them your appreciation.

Dr. Seuss taught us that no matter what or who you are, whether a green headed fudmunkler or a hairy hinkle horn honker you can learn something in the most unsuspecting places if you just keep your eyes open wide and your mind even wider.

I like most have come to rely on email to conduct business. Also like most I have come to accept that more than half of the emails that land in my inbox are spam. Spam email has become an epidemic of sorts. With over 60 billion emails sent by Internet users daily it’s become impossible to sort the worthwhile from the worthless

Similar to the pile of junk postal mail I receive daily (minus the tree killing), it has gotten to the point where the effectiveness of Spam email cannot possibly be more than a fraction of a percent. I mean really, how many online degrees does one guy need? Taking a cue from Dr. Seuss and realizing even the seemingly ridiculous can lead to valuable insight; I took a closer look at Spam email to see what I could learn from it.

The first lesson you learn is that Spam is terribly annoying, interruptive, disruptive and just an all around bad idea when it comes to email marketing. So the first lesson falls under the heading of what not to do. Don’t spam.

Lesson two is a little more intriguing. I began to realize that there were messages contained within the thousands of spam emails that were not only getting through my spam filters but through my minds filter as well. It seems that at will I could remember the top five subjects of the spam email I’m bombarded with daily.

I know where to get the cheapest prescription drugs, the real deal Viagra, how to get women to fall in love with me, get that online degree I’ve always wanted and of course, how to have the best sex of my life (hmmm, maybe this stuffs a little better targeted than I thought?). Why did I remember the subjects of my spam emails yet I cannot remember the messages in the emails I’ve opted in to receive?

So lesson 2 is this – Get to the point with good calls to action.  Spam emails are 100% calls to action. They get to the point, they put the call to action front and center. The spammers know that as soon as you read the first line of text you’re going to delete the message so they literally have a second to catch your attention. By putting the call to action right at the top and getting to the point without fluff they are actually making a connection.

If you follow this same rule of thumb in your email marketing you would make a better connection.  Research shows us that over 75% of email readers do not actually open their email; they read it in the preview pane. Preview panes are very narrow and do not show much information, typically requiring the reader to scroll down. Not in spam email, the message is right there at the top, no need to scroll.

So then why in most legitimate email marketing do we drone on, create fluff and filler. Why don’t we just get to the point and put the call to action right at the top? I mean really, we just want a reader to take away a specific message and take action so why not put the calls to action right in plain site. Call to action first and then marketing fluff.  

We all have the desire to say more than the average person has time to hear. Sometimes we write just because we feel we have more to say but the fact is, the faster we can get to the point the better it is for the reader. They get the message, take action and get on with their day and hopefully your respect for their time leads to a long and mutually successful relationship.

So take it from me if you’d like to be a successful email hum doodler. Get to the point and stop droning on like a purple waz banging wiz noodler.

Lately it seems like everyone that I exchange business cards with immediately puts me on their e-mail list. Let’s clarify. None of the following actions constitutes my (or anyone’s) opting in to your email newsletter: Shaking my hand, exchanging business cards, visiting my website, reading this BLOG, listening to my Podcasts or the fact that you’ve opted into mine. 

Email marketing is an extremely effective tool that can yield great rewards if used properly. Email marketing to people that have not opted in is SPAMMING pure and simple. This tells me that your winning email marketing strategy is to grow your list. What a great strategy! Build a giant list of people whose first impression of your company is annoyance, interruption and disrespect. Great job! You’re a genius. Size doesn’t matter, it’s how you use the tool (that’s my story and I’m sticking to it). I’ll take a small list of people that want my message over a giant list of the non-interested any day. Marketing (online or off) is about making a connection with someone who has interest – again – someone that has interest. Great marketers know how to use email marketing to make the right connections. Sending your email newsletter to everyone you’ve exchanged business cards with does not make you a great marketer it just makes you an ass. 

Anyway – that’s my rant.